God's front door

Yesterday evening was the first in a series of Bible studies that the ladies at our church were encouraged to take part in and, although I enjoy Bible studies, I didn't feel incredibly drawn to join in. The last study I took part in had a book and reading and homework throughout the week and shamefully I just didn't make time for it and therefore didn't get out of it what I should have - you sow nothing then you reap nothing, right? Monday evenings just happen to be the night that Mom and I go to Weight Watchers and the timing was perfect for us to go to our meeting together, eat dinner, and then go to Bible study, and since Mom was very excited about going to the study, I was going to take part no matter what! (I really wasn't made to do it but if I weren't pushed a little then I would have skipped it and missed out on what I want to share with you now, so, thank you, Mom, for "making" me go!)

The study is a video series and last night we heard from a woman by the name of Jill Briscoe. She is British (she said that if you scratched her anywhere you'd find a stamp that said "Made in England"!) and I loved her accent, although she said that we were the ones with the accent since she was speaking English! Anyway, she told us something that has turned my prayer life, or lack thereof, back in the right direction. She spoke of the closeness we should feel with God, that fatherness, and she used the illustration of a woman that she'd met whom she loved to hear pray because of this woman's closeness to God, she would begin her prayers with "Father Dear..." I love that! It's like "Dear Heavenly Father" is so common that we forget what the words mean but when you spin them around and add actual love and adoration to them it takes on this warm relational tone.

Then she read from a book that she wrote, a book that I plan on buying a.s.a.p., called "God's Front Door - Private Conversations". She read about sitting on the front steps of your soul and having God come out and sit with you and the two of you just being near to one another in what she called "the deep place where nobody goes". She used the term "nestling into nearness with God".

I've known that prayer is simply talking to God but I think that too often I talk AT God instead of to Him. "Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for this day, thank you for a good night's sleep, please help us with... (this is where I list all of the things that I want Him to do for me)... in your Holy Name, Amen." So this morning, as I was driving home from dropping the kids off at school, I applied the thought of sitting on the steps of my soul - which I can envision so clearly and I am dying to paint a picture of what I can see in my mind although I'm sure it wouldn't come out the way I'd want it to - and let me tell ya, when I feel God close by I cry, at the altar, whenever something big is going on and I'm really praying to Him, and today with my prayer - my conversation with God on the steps of my soul - I bawled. I boo-hooed until Jack, in his car seat behind me, said, "Mommy?!", I'm sure he was wondering what was up with Mom! It was so awesome!!! I just honestly felt God there with me, smiling at me because his little girl had finally figured out that He just wanted her to talk with Him, to sit with Him and nestle into his nearness. You wanna feel small and helpless? Pray with that in mind, you'll feel so tiny and needy but held and comforted all the same, it's just awesome. I overuse the term "awesome" but my brain won't give me another adjective that works here!

But I need to be honest, I don't trust myself. I know my history - I cry to God, I repent, I feel horrible guilt over not spending time with Him and I vow to be more faithful to our daily conversations; then I allow busyness to interfere and I fall away once more until months have gone by and my relationship with my Father has suffered severely and I'm nudged once again into renewing my vows of faithfulness to Him. So, right now I'm on a high, I'm lit up from the time I invested in Him and a freshly renewed sense of duty and privilege, but I fear myself, I doubt my ability to stay true to Him even in the midst of the glow that time with Him has given me.

My thoughts are that maybe by sharing this with you then I'll feel continuously reminded to stick to it and when I feel that I'm no longer setting on the steps with Him but I'm over in the corner of the yard trying to yell my wants and needs to Him maybe I'll look back at this post and feel drawn back to the steps where I need and want to be.

Camping in Pocahontas County

We were recently blessed to be invited to go to Pocahontas County with our friends, Jason and Amy Green and their two kids, Zoe and Zach, to stay at their camp on the Greenbrier River. We left on Thursday and came home on Sunday. We had such an enjoyable time with them and the scenery was astounding! I kept telling Jay that he needed to find work in Pocahontas County so we could move there, it is amazingly beautiful, the perfect blend of mountains and farmlands, and there is so much to do there that we'd never be bored! We ran around some but the best times of the entire trip were spent at the camp, around the fire, and at or in the river. The kids played so good together and they thoroughly enjoyed the freedom they had to play where they wanted when they wanted to.

We all got to fish some, the boys especially loved standing on the river bank trying to catch something. I think Zach spent more time with a fishing pole in his hands than he did doing anything else!

The kids loved getting to swim in the river ( a first for Jacob and Jaylen ) and did so as much as we would let them.

Jaylen wanted to take a bath in the river so we gave them some soap and shampoo and let them wash off in the water.

Jay, Jacob, and Jaylen took a canoe trip up the river with Jason and Amy and their two, I had to stay behind with a sleeping Jackson. This was the first time my kids had been on a boat and they loved it. The water was shallow enough to stand up in most of the way up the river so it wasn't as intimidating as it could have been in deeper water.

We had the chance to go see some things that were nearby and some things that we'd been wanting to see, such as:

The Green Bank Telescope and Science Center

Snowshoe ( we passed a sign that said "Snowshoe, the top of the world" and they were right, you climb a very tall and steep mountain and then it is very windy and cold at the top and you could see for miles and miles )
Beartown State Park
Droop Mountain Civil War Battlesite

The Falls of Hill Creek, where the kids got to play in the clean, cold creek.

I have a ton of pictures but I don't have the patience to upload them all. These pics I've posted capture some of the fun but they can't convey just how much we enjoyed our time with Amy and Jason and the kids. As we were pulling out of the driveway to go home, one of the kids mentioned coming back up sometime even if the Green's weren't able to be there and I told them that it wouldn't be the same without them there and there would be no sense in ever going up there without them. The place was wonderful but it was the company that made the trip worthwhile. I am so thankful for the time we had and hope for more trips to Pocahontas County in the future.

Here is our group shot, taken right before we left to go home ~

It's about time!

Oh, wow, I really have neglected my blog, haven't I? I think I just got busy and a little overwhelmed and a little bit worn out so my brain wouldn't open up and even attempt to be creative or interesting. Can't say that I'm anywhere near interesting yet but I am feeling the need to feed my blog, it's starving.

Points of interest in the past 2 months:

We had an impromptu invite to the beach with my sister and her family. It was one of the best vacations I've taken yet! This was the first time the kids have been to the beach and the first time that Jay and I have ever been to the beach together. Topsail Island is absolutely beautiful, quiet, and the beach was practically empty for us. We were so blessed to get to go to a cute little house on a gorgeous beach and spend our time with the best of company. My sister and I collected an enormous amount of shells on our daily walks and I have them out as decorations in my house now because of the memories they hold.

School wrapped up for the year at the end of April, when I turned the kids' portfolio's in to a teacher at our church. Ahhh...what a nice breather summer is! I never fully understood why teachers loved summer so much until I became one myself! The only thing is that when I "let the monkeys out" they don't leave! I know, I know, someday they will and I will be sad but at the moment it would be nice to have a little alone time here and there! Still, summer is upon us and I intend for us to drain every drop of enjoyment out of it.

We celebrated my dad's 60th birthday and my inlaws' 50th wedding anniversary.

We held our first SNOUT (Sunday Night OUT) with the youth group. We opened our home to over 40 people and I loved every minute of it!

I've recently...okay, two days ago...put us on a schedule. I drag my butt out of bed at 5:50 to go for a 3 mi. walk before Jay leaves for work, then I actually get a shower and put on clothes before breakfast (I know, wow). I have set times for breakfast, computer time for the kids, an hour of reading with the kids, art time (gag, I don't enjoy it much but the kids love it, sooo...), and lunch. Then downtime (more for me than for them, 5:50am comes calling to me somewhere around 1:00pm!) with a movie, free time until dinner, wii time for the kids, and set clean-up and bed time (8:45 kids, 10:00 parents) that I'm holding us all to. So far so good and I hope that I can stick to it, it gives order to the day and I like order. I like being lazy sometimes, too, though, so I really have to work at this! Fingers crossed, prayers said!

And last but definitely not least, Jackson turned 2 yesterday. Two. I'd say that it's hard to believe that he is that old already but it isn't hard to believe, he's been in his "terrible two's" for 10 months already! He is hilarious, mean, ornery, cuddly, spirited, and stubborn all rolled into an energetic little ball, a ball that climbs, wrestles, hits, pulls hair, and screams, but also hugs, kisses, winks, smiles the biggest smile ever, and fits perfectly and warmly into my arms. Things would be very different around here without him - albiet quieter and calmer at times, but there would be a love and laughter deficit and we can't be having that. We are having his birthday party tomorrow and we are shopping for something special for him tonight. I plan on posting pics of him after the party sometime.

In the meantime, here are some random pics from the last couple of months:

"The Girls" on our back porch begging for handouts -

Jaylen and Jacob's lemonade and cookie stand (completely Jaylen's idea, she snuck out and was selling our lemonade before I knew what she was doing!) -

Jaylen's artwork at the church art show -

Jacob's artwork at the church art show -

Our table that Mom and I decorated for the Ladies Spring Tea, our first time doing a table (I chose a beach theme because of our beach trip and used things brought home from Topsail to decorate with - it was the only beachy table there and we got tons of compliments; I was proud of it!) -

A day out

Since Spring decided to give us a little preview last Saturday, and since we've been rather cooped up and we're all suffering from Cabin Fever, and since Upward season is over so our Saturdays are free again, we decided to take off to the Game Farm and other sites around it. Remember I said we all have Cabin Fever...here's proof...

I know, I know, you're jealous that you couldn't go along with us and experience this level of insanity for the entire day-long trip, trust me, it was this level ALL day. We've figured out the sense in mini-vans, as uncool as they are they do allow more space between your ears and the mouths of your screaming, fighting, noise-making kids, and they allow you to space the kids out so you don't hear the incessant screeching from Jack because they have touched him (or looked at him, or moved their arms wrongly near him - he's touchy ) and you don't have the older two getting into fist fights while you are driving. Someday, we will probably have a mini-van ( blech ).

So, on to the Game Farm... we've been here twice now and we love it. Here are the pics:

After that, we went to Falls Mill and had a picnic and climbed around the rocks and waterfall, then we drove up to Sutton Dam and looked around at it, talked about how badly we want kayaks to go out on, then we stopped by the bulk food store in Flatwoods and picked up some goodies, then on to home. We all had a great day and slept like logs that night! I love the warmer weather!

Snowy morning

This morning was beautiful and snowy and I thought I'd share some pics that I took:

(Ignore my messy front porch complete with Christmas-tree-yet-to-be-put-up-by-procrastinating-husband.)

Pics from Christmas

Here are some of my favorite pics from all of our Christmas festivities:

The first set are from our dinner with my side of the family at my sister's house:

These are from our dinner with Jay's side of the family at our house:

And these are when we opened our gifts from our neighbors/good friends Burr, Debbie, Tasha, and JJ:

Jaylen turns 6

Six years old.

Wow.

It's funny, though, Jaylen seemed to mature faster than Jacob so actually her being six years old now seems fitting, not shocking or hard to grasp. She chose to have her birthday dinner at Olive Garden this year and she thoroughly enjoyed being the center of attention. It was our five, plus Mama and Papa On the Hill, Mama Next Door, Aunt Cathy, and Josh. It was a beautiful snowy evening and we had a little seperate room to ourselves and we could watch the snow falling outside. She loved all of her presents and has given each of them plenty of use by now.

Unfortunately she had to revisit her birthday meal during the night - having only been two days since her bout with the stomach bug her tummy couldn't handle all that rich food and evicted it promptly through the upstairs window. Isn't that a great memory?!

Happy Birthday, beautiful little girl, we love you more than you can ever imagine!!!